An Ode To The Wedding Photographer

So I'm taking a shower this morning and thinking about what to post on Facebook.
I realize that last statement clearly makes me an addict, but let's keep going with the story...
I get a few ideas and then one of them seems to rhyme and I thought "pretty cool".
A little while later Jolene and I are chillin' in an oncology doctor's waiting room and I get a few more ideas.
So I start tapping them out on my iPhone.
Doctor visits can be kinda lengthy so I made pretty good progress as I sat there.
I emailed it to myself and finished nuancing it at home.

It became entirely too long for my Facebook status so my little poem about this past weekend's wedding has graduated to it's own blog post.
Without further ado...



An Ode To The Wedding Photographer

Heading to Mobile - a late decision to drive
It would be just a short 9 hours before I'd arrive
A baconator for breakfast with fries on the side
A diet coke to delude me as I continued my drive

Burgers and beer and shrimp & grits - some culinary highlights of my recent trip
We won't stop there, the memories are many - car crashes, alligators and chicks in bikinis!

The rain came in buckets for an hour or so,
I switched on my hazards so the guy behind would go slow!
The E-Myth Revisited on audiobook
I'd never got though it had it been a plane that I'd took.

Slow iTunes from iPhones had me growing tired
But a quick stop for a mocha and soon I was wired
I need to hit the road, but first a moment to pee
Despite all the photo-ops waiting for me

Mobile at last! My GPS didn't fail
The rehearsal dinner till eleven and then had to bail
My hotel room was decent, despite smelling like mold
gifts from guests past - their stories untold

Leno and Fallon do their thing on the tube
While I check my email before drifting to snooze

Up around ten and start to get dressed
a check on the weather has me distressed
Big chance of rain and in the 80's it'll run
dressed all in black - this should be fun

The elevator hits five and opens with a ding
I head down the hall - time to do my thing
Half-dressed girls fill the room, this isn't the first
But of all my jobs, this isn't the worst

Some wrapped in towels and some dressed in pink
Some with glittery sparkles but all with a drink
I pull out my camera from my bag by the dresser
And capture these ladies becoming prettier than ever

A detour to the pool to shoot a few friends
And then it's off to the church - before it begins
The bride's in her dress and she's ready to go
I glance at her mom as the tears start to roll

The bus with the guests and groom has arrived
The bride dashes to the garden - we're still shooting outside!
Tell the driver to keep going while we rush her inside
That was a close one - almost saw his new bride!

The guests, all seated, now start to stand
The bride looks lovely, her entrance is grand
I glance to the front, "where is the groom?"
He's still with the minister in the back room!

"no flash" the alter guild kept saying to me as a warning
perhaps now she'll get the groom, so we can get going
Some prayers and a hymn and a bit of communion
Two rings and a kiss - now it's a union!

I shoot away as they head down the aisle
Past all their friends all covered in smiles
Now friends and family gather in the shade
And I keep on clicking as memories are made

Getting to the reception this party is hummin'
I'm thinking about food - there's nothing in my oven
subtly scan the buffet to see what might be yummy
I guess it all was - nothing left for my tummy

no worries I guess, I've been hungry before
I keep unloading my gear and get ready for more
scanning the sky and checking the light
I pull out my softbox - we're doing this right

A few strobist tricks to amaze and amuse
It would seem wireless flash has been experienced by few
Switching to manual, my exposure dialed in
This is where the rockin' shots start to begin

Shots of the fellas and even more of the ladies
I'm loving this light - it's freakin' crazy!
Everyone's chimping my screen, it's going so well
The compliments roll in, my head's starting to swell

As the sun goes away we all head inside
With this group were still in for one wild ride
With beer and liquor flowing for all of the guests
The DJ is hit with a barrage of requests

The DJ is tapped as a solitary strummer
but the iPods come out - this party isn't over
The dancing is wild and karaoke's a hit
The reception is great - the partiers are lit

As Flo-Rida does his thing, a lone cop strolls in
It seems even the best parties must come to an end
I say my good-byes with hugs and best wishes
A few beer-goggled lovelies even offering kisses

As I drive back to my room and think back over the day
This was a good one - I gotta say
Tons of sweet shots with cool, creamy bokeh
But tomorrow's a long drive, I'm looking forward to that mocha.



An iPhone shot of my mocha :)